tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37441328811555042262024-03-22T06:00:43.052+02:00Demeter'sI have no story to be told.Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.comBlogger136125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-18485541168998107072018-09-06T18:46:00.001+03:002018-09-06T18:46:45.726+03:00Caterie<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Keep remembering fragments of you,<br />
the jokes you've made,<br />
the way you cheered me up,<br />
the smiles you gave.<br />
<br />
You tried your best<br />
and I pushed,<br />
to the limit where you were,<br />
caught between given up<br />
and seeing how much more can you take,<br />
my thoughts are,<br />
that it wasn't the right time for us.<br />
<br />
I still was caught up in my own things,<br />
didn't learned yet how to give them up,<br />
and you were full of life,<br />
of joyful thoughts,<br />
I couldn't sync myself to stop,<br />
to absolve everything ,<br />
to enjoy and live the moment<br />
with you,with us.<br />
<br />
Never known what to say,<br />
I always wrote down an a sheet of paper,<br />
as white as it was,<br />
my every dark or coloured thought.<br />
<br />
Something is wrong with me,<br />
I am dark,nothing personal ,<br />
just can't control myself.<br />
<br />
I am lost,caught in a tangled web,<br />
a maze a labyrinth of thoughts,<br />
my deepness cries,<br />
for the what if's<br />
and what not's. </div>
Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-9931959424408568002018-09-06T18:35:00.002+03:002018-09-06T18:35:41.883+03:00Alta<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
One day in another life,<br />
we collide,<br />
shatter in pieces,<br />
rebuild as a whole,<br />
once more I can have you,<br />
look into your eyes,<br />
when they are smiling back at me<br />
with joy with love.<br />
<br />
Embrace you in an eternal hug,<br />
never let you go,<br />
my love.<br />
<br />
I wonder if out souls<br />
live eternal ?<br />
Reborn again,different time,<br />
different set.<br />
<br />
I wonder if I met you<br />
in another life,long time ago?<br />
What we were,because I felt so connected to you<br />
in this one,and I wonder if I see you again<br />
in a different time ,different set.<br />
<br />
Felt close to you,so good<br />
like a met you before,<br />
I need answers, need more.<br />
<br />
You told me once<br />
you felt the same,<br />
so what is the lesson,<br />
should we learn and gain ?<br />
<br />
And if we learn that lesson<br />
we still be together ?<br />
Or things change.<br />
Either way you marked my heart,<br />
engraved my soul.<br />
<br /></div>
Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-40827832719698908942018-09-06T18:25:00.001+03:002018-09-06T18:25:05.353+03:00Still<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Still can't believe<br />
I am alone,and she is not with me<br />
can't embrace nor settle down<br />
to me everything right now,<br />
seems pointless like empty ground.<br />
<br />
Each decision lacks confidence<br />
acting on impulse,not on ration,<br />
lost o lot of time,<br />
never will I learn my lesson.<br />
<br />
<br />
Life carried me along,<br />
forward to the break of dawn,<br />
gave me chances,gave me hope<br />
but I am here,still feel alone.<br />
<br />
My mind sometimes forgets,<br />
but my heart hurts,regrets.<br />
Once in a while a lonely thought<br />
brings me back to what I have lost.</div>
Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-61648043655408032532018-09-06T18:19:00.002+03:002018-09-06T18:19:40.991+03:00Never again<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I miss her<br />
because I let her in the home of my soul<br />
gave her the key and free will.<br />
Sometimes I miss her laughter<br />
as it echoes inside my mind,my head.<br />
Sometimes I miss her smile<br />
as it flashes in my eyes.<br />
Sometimes I miss her kisses<br />
the warm embrace of her lips.<br />
Sometimes I wish I could have done,<br />
more for me,for her ,for us.<br />
<br />
Probably I will remember her<br />
to the day I am gone,<br />
never going to see her,<br />
never is going to be what it was.</div>
Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-83189335868592150052018-09-06T18:14:00.001+03:002018-09-06T18:14:34.342+03:00EXpect<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Maybe I expected a couple of weeks more,<div>
now at the ending a whisper </div>
<div>
or a kind word,a gesture a farewell.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
The world is big,maybe we collide,</div>
<div>
maybe in this vast land,our eyes catch up again,</div>
<div>
in a crowd ,in a distant land.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Foreign to us,but we feel familiar again</div>
<div>
enjoy a coffee with a select words spoken,</div>
<div>
but our hearts restlessly awoken ,</div>
<div>
and once more they beat a rhythm ,</div>
<div>
long time ago thought forgiven.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Always thought,</div>
<div>
that the world is big enough,</div>
<div>
to cover our tracks,</div>
<div>
to hide ourselves .</div>
</div>
Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-88095021695470850662018-07-05T19:07:00.001+03:002018-07-05T19:11:24.337+03:00Warrior of light <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Life taught me<br />
that I am inexperienced,<br />
yet not fully aware.<br />
<br />
Taking things for granted<br />
need to show fear.,<br />
fear of loss,<br />
appreciate what I have,<br />
what I have won,<br />
fear of life,hold tight!<br />
Be strong!Hold my temper.<br />
<br />
Judge whilst blood is cold<br />
hold down on anger,<br />
have patience, keep calm<br />
good things will come.<br />
<br />
I believe that dearly<br />
don't lose hope<br />
and love yourself baby.</div>
Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-29237703187919458632018-05-06T04:00:00.002+03:002018-05-06T04:00:36.933+03:00Reborn<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I depart from my past love,<br />
still wounded still hurt.<br />
I move forward unto dawn<br />
don't know the path .<br />
<br />
<br />
I realize I been negative <br />
all my life,<br />
always unhappy ,<br />
always miserable .<br />
<br />
I need to search deep within <br />
heal myself ,<br />
more then skin deep .<br />
Need my mind at ease. <br />
<br />
Happy thoughts <br />
to conjure .<br />
Positive vibes in my soul,<br />
change my madness .<br />
Reborn. </div>
Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-70128716467254348062018-05-04T21:37:00.000+03:002018-05-04T21:37:13.881+03:00Sweet pain <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I followed my heart<br />
blindfolded with lust ,<br />
Even the past<br />
the small imperfections ,<br />
I loved you beyond .<br />
<br />
I loved you like<br />
there was nothing for me out there .<br />
Loved you on the edge of my sanity ,<br />
lost you in me incomprehensibility.<br />
<br />
And when I did<br />
I lost myself ,<br />
Shattered in pieces<br />
far beyond my grasp.<br />
<br />
No horizon in front<br />
I stood there and watched ,<br />
a broken self ,<br />
building against...<br />
A beacon of hope ,<br />
a creator of strength.</div>
Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-55308501939907552492018-05-03T20:57:00.000+03:002018-05-03T20:57:06.211+03:00Creator <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
When you shatter<br />
In pieces of a puzzle<br />
Pieces that you thought you lost<br />
You lose yourself in the creation itself .<br />
<br />
Rebuild yourself<br />
From a foundation of trust<br />
Rebuild yourself<br />
And stay true to yourself .<br />
<br />
You are a master<br />
A slave to none<br />
A creator of your kingdom<br />
A king of your domain .<br />
<br />
Fight like a Spartan<br />
Love like there's no tomorrow<br />
Live the moment<br />
Live the fullest .<br />
<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-16295052067044057182018-05-01T21:45:00.002+03:002018-05-01T21:45:53.523+03:00All that is not<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
I ran so as I thought<br />
from all that is there ,<br />
and all that is not.<br />
<br />
A misfit among all,<br />
lost in comfort <br />
don't wanna stop.<br />
<br />
I thought I am rational,<br />
but i am not.<br />
Reckless behavior.<br />
<br />
<br />
Stupid decisions <br />
all I lost ...<br />
I taken from myself.</div>
Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-84716421567573846892018-05-01T21:43:00.002+03:002018-05-01T21:43:12.297+03:00Control <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Perhaps I shouldn't <br />
Build up such a crazy desire<br />
Inside that burns with eyes on fire <br />
<br />
Can never be free ,because I am always on the run<br />
Hiding from my own reality,for how long .<br />
Can I still evade can I still postpone <br />
I am 27 should I still go on ?<br />
<br />
Ended up now taking some risks <br />
Leaving the comfort enjoying the sins<br />
Plunging into unknown,feeling the shock <br />
Absorbing everything that comes ...<br />
<br />
<br />
I believe what I see,I believe myself <br />
But underneath all I still lying <br />
Still afraid of all.<br />
Life is brutal won't forgive nor forget <br />
If I am going though hell<br />
Surely I won't stop .<br />
<br />
<br />
There is a place for me also <br />
Somewhere above <br />
Hopes dies last.<br />
And when it does <br />
Abandon all,Abandon yourself.<br />
<br />
<br />
2017 január 25 <br /></div>
Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-13707714040285654332016-08-20T17:19:00.001+03:002016-08-20T17:19:10.688+03:00amidst<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Amidst my thoughts<br />
I share a blank stare,<br />
surrounded by confusion,<br />
I despair...<br />
<br />
Lost I am not,<br />
but uncertain of the path to take,<br />
kill myself ,<br />
dance on my grave.<br />
<br />
Caught up<br />
by my own mistakes,<br />
loud voices, I shout<br />
inside my confused thoughts.<br />
<br />
Lost.. I am not,<br />
but neither found,<br />
taken,but now alone,<br />
either way I am gone.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br /></div>
Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-81176733370262421902014-03-25T14:43:00.000+02:002014-03-25T17:13:21.592+02:00In toate un glas<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHKq41tITXe7ot255KiIwUFKGWKz8Op_PUAXEr_aGrp1aFgPERN82kPxAPbHTMZwB0GA5mrolpsRQjW3KamVrpawnstGzn7eUBSTw4IZsqWvCz7E6sQkRybtsOu1UAsWKRU6mG3kwJuzUi/s1600/tumblr_n28i84bgG31qb5t88o1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHKq41tITXe7ot255KiIwUFKGWKz8Op_PUAXEr_aGrp1aFgPERN82kPxAPbHTMZwB0GA5mrolpsRQjW3KamVrpawnstGzn7eUBSTw4IZsqWvCz7E6sQkRybtsOu1UAsWKRU6mG3kwJuzUi/s1600/tumblr_n28i84bgG31qb5t88o1_500.jpg" height="213" width="320" /></a></div>
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<div style="text-align: left;">
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">si cand<u> credeam </u>ca am gasit oaza de liniste,<u>ca</u> am gasit-o pe Ea</span></i></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"> ,Ea un moment de liniste in aceasta lume asurzitoare,asi fi vrut sa te stiu ca pe o limba moarta sa iti cunosc doar eu toate secretele,tu sa fi un fragment dintr-un vers lipsa,care o ador,sa fi o enigma completandu-mi misterul .</span></i></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></i></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"> Dar probabil <u>t</u>e voi pierde caci pierzandu-te dor<u>u</u>l ma va călăuzi pana ce tu v<u>e</u>i fi doar un alt obi<u>s</u>nuit,dar te voi <u>ti</u>ne minte,vo<u>ce</u>a ta pasiunea din ea,tristetea bucuria, un amalgam de trairi din ea te <u>v</u>oi tine minte si candva imi vei <u>rea</u>minte ce am pierd<u>u</u>t.</span></i></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><u>Si</u> ce pierd in continuare,Ea find una din<u>t</u>r<u>e</u> Acele,sau poate chiar Ea.</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></i>
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i> Tot ce voiam,tot ce aveam, <u>pierd</u>eam prin simplul fapt ca refuzam.Tot</i> ce<i> asi fi vrut </i><span style="font-style: italic;">nu</span><i> o sa am.Totul un vartej,totul doar fum,o spirala al unei nevoi ce a re</i><span style="font-style: italic;">s</span><i>imt din plin,nevoie de noi,nevoie de dor.</i><span style="font-style: italic;">Sa simt</span><i> din nou.</i></span><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"> </span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></i>
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></i>
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"> Timpul te invata</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"> sa nu iti mai pasa</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"> Ea te linisteste </span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"> rade puternic,rade fericita</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"> tot ce zice Ea,timpul nu iarta.</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></i>
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></i>
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"> Te pierde Ea,te regasesti in Ea</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"> dar Ei tot nu ii va pasa</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"> Dar tu prin un zambet surd</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"> O asculti,O simti,O vrei</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"> Te abtii caci te stii</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"> Ca tu niciodata nu vei simti</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></i>
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></i>
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"> Timpul nu iti va permite</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"> sa traiesti cu ea cum vrei</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"> Tu te pierzi si ierti,</span></i><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i> Si o vrei fericita</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i> Dar tu nu stii ce vrei</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i> De teama,de tine.</i></span><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></i>
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"> </span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"> </span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></i>
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"> </span></i> </div>
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Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-88375867567355921382014-02-28T19:01:00.000+02:002014-02-28T19:01:10.980+02:00Till<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<br />
<br />
<br />
Till I almost hate<br />
mornings,evenings ,days<br />
fuck you it's ok<br />
fuck you because I want to<br />
fuck you I don't give a fuck<br />
it's always the fuck before all.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
and after all the fuck<br />
I just don't really give a fuck<br />
you had my time my heart<br />
you fucked it up<br />
yeah you fucked up<br />
yes I fuck you,<br />
it's all gone.<br />
<br />
the fuck</div>
Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-51400236420879282282014-02-16T12:39:00.005+02:002014-02-16T12:41:20.698+02:00Mercy<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="background-color: white; color: #008880; font-family: Georgia, cursive; font-size: 30px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 25px;">"I don’t want to be at the mercy of my</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #008880; font-family: Georgia, cursive; font-size: 30px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 25px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #008880; font-family: Georgia, cursive; font-size: 30px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 25px;"> emotions. I want to use them, to enjoy them,</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #008880; font-family: Georgia, cursive; font-size: 30px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 25px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #008880; font-family: Georgia, cursive; font-size: 30px; letter-spacing: 1px; line-height: 25px;"> and to dominate them."</span><br />
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Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-28468041444622704122014-02-12T14:33:00.000+02:002014-02-12T14:33:45.384+02:00Speechless voices<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<i style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: x-large;">After all, the fall is sweet</i></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i>words hurt so deep,<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i>a dying of a simple soul,<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i>It’s not quite eternal…</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i><o:p></o:p></i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i>Made of glass,<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i>shatter once more<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i>break ourselves,<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i>in a thousand and more.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i>Pieces of us<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i>everywhere we go,<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i>remind us sweetheart.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i>Mortals!<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i>Sins of the flesh<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i>we crave for lust<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i>devour our love,<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i> in speechless voices<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><i>Inside our souls.</i></span><o:p></o:p></div>
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Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-29195735275711063872014-02-11T17:11:00.004+02:002014-02-11T17:12:04.030+02:00Senseless desires<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>U I carry on my unexpressed lips<o:p></o:p></i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>words I swallow just to keep,<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>eyes search for something missed.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>bodies align to reap,<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>havoc on a silent night.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>fall in and out,we lose sight,<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>but keep in touch<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>we wage war,we the frontline.<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>head through a storm<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>it shreds us in senseless desires,<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>above and beyond<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>reckless and higher.</i></span></div>
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Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-10115820584381606452014-02-10T17:29:00.004+02:002014-02-10T17:30:16.767+02:00Flaw of a love<br />
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<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">february bring to me</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">the flaw of a love</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"> that sickened me.</span></i><br />
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<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">tempt me to quit,</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">to reach out, grasp the cold,</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">to embrace that</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">emptyness is a form.</span></i><br />
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<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">tempt me to quit,</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">make me fall so deep,</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">to feel lost, to feel weak.</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></i>
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">make me do things that I regret,</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">make me sadder at the end,</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">make me whatever u want,</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">just do it quick </span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">before I'm gone.</span></i><br />
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<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">it's not quit right</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">the things we want,</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">the loves we had</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">the lyes told,</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">they rotten the soul,</span></i><br />
<i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">and prevail us</span></i><br />
<i style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">to be a whole.</span></i><br />
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<i style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></i>Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-37697434322971795532014-02-09T21:42:00.001+02:002014-02-09T21:43:03.110+02:00Te va salva<h3>
<u> <i>Poate lucrurile nu sunt chiar cum ti-ai imaginat...numai un pic...incep asa...</i></u></h3>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgs_UzMAcAP76GzqWlrRsNgpLeiOjZep5q_hYkCRoUm8BFekoojHwm7_r9Khaw-pJo9oH2fZoRueVvfhsxpAG4ROkOVBgQR7yN7gmdvZKNiGTONGBaoX_oPh3jE_Lnyxceq9BN4r3FfCr7S/s1600/tumblr_n0kwxaCmjO1qb5t88o1_500+(1).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgs_UzMAcAP76GzqWlrRsNgpLeiOjZep5q_hYkCRoUm8BFekoojHwm7_r9Khaw-pJo9oH2fZoRueVvfhsxpAG4ROkOVBgQR7yN7gmdvZKNiGTONGBaoX_oPh3jE_Lnyxceq9BN4r3FfCr7S/s1600/tumblr_n0kwxaCmjO1qb5t88o1_500+(1).jpg" height="213" width="320" /></a><br />
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<u><span style="font-size: large;">Te-ai trezit</span></u> <i style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">intr-o dimineata pur si simplu </i><u><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;">sfâșiat</span><span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"> </span></u><i style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">de panica </i><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><u>si</u></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> </span><i style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;">anxietate,intr-un minut poate zeci si zeci de ganduri se năpustesc asupra ta,iar tu doar,tu doar </i><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><u>suferi</u></span><i style="font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', serif;"> nefiind capabil sa faci nimic?</i><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-style: italic;"> Te cuprinde întreaga viata traita intr-un bol din sticla ,cu suficient aer cat de cat sa nu te sufoci,cand totul ti-se pare </span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><u>cladit din carti de joc pe un fundal de nisip miscator</u></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-style: italic;">...cand totul pare pierdut cand te pierzi cand incepi sa nu respiri cum trebuie cuprins de teroarea viitorului,cand stii ca vei pierde tot,ii vei pierde pe toti cei apropiati tie, al caror voci si fete le vezi in fata ta,le auzi in mintea ta, ti-se sfasie inima,</span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><u>te simti</u></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-style: italic;"> pustiit... </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-style: italic;"> Te trezesti in acea dimineata mai ales in februarie,</span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><u>speriat</u></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-style: italic;"> si cu gandul de a imbratisa pe cineva,</span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><u>dar</u></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-style: italic;"> te intinzi prin pat,iti intinzi bratele </span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><u>sperand</u></span> <span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><u>ca</u></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-style: italic;"> vei cuprinde pe cineva,ca vei atinge</span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><u> o fiinta calda</u></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-style: italic;"> care la randul ei </span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><u>te va cuprinde</u></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-style: italic;"> si ea,si in acel moment nu te vei mai simti pierdut,speriat,</span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><u>si</u></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-style: italic;"> sfasiat de panica,</span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><u>te vei simti iubit</u></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-style: italic;">,dorit,mai viu ca niciodata,mai dornic sa iti traiesti viata ca niciodata.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-style: italic;"> </span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><u>Dar</u></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-style: italic;">...</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-style: italic;">iti intinzi bratele,si </span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><u>nu este nimeni</u></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-style: italic;"> acolo,nimeni!!!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-style: italic;">Si in acea dimineata de februarie,frig, </span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><u>si </u></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-style: italic;">nuante de gri, frig si tu singur zaci acolo in acele momente...stiind ca</span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><u> nimeni nu te va salva</u></span><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-style: italic;">.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjk81Ys-sxoryrWSgk3zzdyFKK5Osdmwt8Q69uJBVqHRkl-5wyfrRU8WiNOz8Cz0D2u1V1x6YEtL-8j9SKXMNHxscq8LSCBjGRSV8e68_6u9ETZYWjFbMrpnG-rsxl-8OuWrgWJdKxOV-Ry/s1600/tumblr_n0jdymNDAO1qb5t88o1_500+(1).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><i><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjk81Ys-sxoryrWSgk3zzdyFKK5Osdmwt8Q69uJBVqHRkl-5wyfrRU8WiNOz8Cz0D2u1V1x6YEtL-8j9SKXMNHxscq8LSCBjGRSV8e68_6u9ETZYWjFbMrpnG-rsxl-8OuWrgWJdKxOV-Ry/s1600/tumblr_n0jdymNDAO1qb5t88o1_500+(1).jpg" height="215" width="320" /></i></span></a></div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><i> Trec si acele momente, iti revii usor,te obliga viata,rutina sa iti revii,aproape ca uiti,dar vei tine minte .</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-style: italic;"> </span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large;"><u>Ce vei face in continuare...?</u></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>......</i></span>Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-60243253057150311232014-02-07T17:53:00.003+02:002014-02-08T00:31:47.926+02:00 Storm of a real She<br />
Storm of a real She<br />
<br />
<br />
cold is the morning ,when I wake up<br />
afraid of the fact that I'm mortal<br />
I fear death<br />
I feel lost,<br />
felt lost in my dreams<br />
which I forgot in 5 minutes<br />
upon woken up<br />
<br />
thoughts about what im going to do<br />
scare me,getting nowhere fast<br />
nobody wakes me up<br />
no warm lips kissing me<br />
sweet tender love<br />
<br />
no voice in the backround<br />
telling me take care<br />
I love you so much.<br />
the routine slowly kills me<br />
oh dear oh God,<br />
days pass through me<br />
I'm passing through life.<br />
<br />
where is the one<br />
that calls me by my name<br />
and hugs me so much<br />
and puts together once more<br />
all my broken parts.<br />
<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiU25n3NJSXas_ZGAcjvqyjMlLL2YuYeraTtewGhdIfNxhtfBaT1bAftSv7g90HBawQPFaHQtm0hcBSfMrLfxnsdkUOzXk8X7weV_Nvoh5e8tBqaZBN88rijXBA_Cb6FZ3CNlmqw09OpnkE/s1600/IMG_5520.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiU25n3NJSXas_ZGAcjvqyjMlLL2YuYeraTtewGhdIfNxhtfBaT1bAftSv7g90HBawQPFaHQtm0hcBSfMrLfxnsdkUOzXk8X7weV_Nvoh5e8tBqaZBN88rijXBA_Cb6FZ3CNlmqw09OpnkE/s1600/IMG_5520.JPG" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-44645506313925565262014-02-03T19:26:00.000+02:002014-02-05T20:28:48.566+02:00<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
A remember tempus fugit</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
seems that air is one thing that keeps on wishing me a breakthrough, the hell we raised together in my soul, is mirrored by a wandering state of alternating heartaches, each one is unique and each one kills, kills more then it feeds the lost.<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
I wanted to be killed in seasons, killed in the leafs and set free by the wind.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
always seemed that you were the only being ,in whose arms I felt sheltered by this terible reality,and you offered me something that I needed the most</div>
<div>
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</div>
Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-5991491893830126882014-02-02T15:44:00.002+02:002014-02-07T17:54:55.600+02:00Into the fray<h2>
<u>Into the fray</u></h2>
<br />
<br />
o reflecție a trăirilor ce le simt eu,<br />
trupul tau un ocean de viata<br />
reflecta in ale ei adâncuri ,<br />
de-a pururi, un suflet pierdut pe multe drumuri.<br />
<br />
<br />
chiar daca esti aici<br />
tot nu esti,dar eu te simt<br />
departe de tot,<br />
atentia ce imi acorzi, doar un ad-hoc.<br />
<br />
in privirea ta desertaciune iubito,<br />
pe mine nu ma vrei<br />
esti atrasa de prospetimea aventurilor<br />
in companie celor ,<br />
care taiau in carne vie<br />
sangele si vorbele lor false<br />
te tin in suspans,<br />
pana ce it all fades ,te lasa.<br />
<br />
<br />
iubito eu te iert dar nu te uit<br />
te vreau aproape dar departe,<br />
de inima mea ce nu prea se mai zbate,<br />
ce simte ca in zadar cea ce face,<br />
dar mintea mea nu ii da pace,<br />
o amorteste o bate.<br />
<br />
<br />
tu prin tine traiesti cu cea ce altii te hranesc<br />
minciuni si vrajeli,<br />
pana te prind te dovedesc,<br />
pana toti te aburesc.<br />
<br />
dar simte si traieste<br />
alunga teama,<br />
traieste la vida loca<br />
pana la urma moka,<br />
iti vei dori alinare,<br />
iti vei dori pace<br />
<br />
inca o sansa pentru stabilitate.<br />
<br />
<br />
<h3 style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue Light', HelveticaNeue-Light, 'Helvetica Neue', Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-weight: bolder; margin: 0.83em 0px; padding: 0px; position: relative; text-align: justify;">
Volumes of S<br />Chapter "14</h3>
<div>
<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;"><u><b><i>sgk I</i></b></u></span></div>
Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-78336790391886475122014-01-26T21:40:00.002+02:002014-02-07T17:55:07.331+02:00 Sunday 26 "Day of Snow"<h3>
Volumes of She<br />Chapter "14</h3>
<br />
<h2>
Sunday 26 "Day of Snow"</h2>
<i><br /></i>
<i> <span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">Imi doream o alinare,doream compania ta, tu erai cea care ma linistea,care ma facea sa ma simt in stare sa mut munti.</span></i><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>Tu ai fost,esti si vei ramane adrenalina mea.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>Tu erai inspiratia mea pentru toate,si imi dai in continuare inspiratie sa scriu,da...dar ce rezolv am dorinta sa scriu,dar este in zadar.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>de ce?</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>cum tu nu mai faci parte din mine,sau nu vrei sa faci parte,pentru cine sa mai scriu?Eu scriam pentru tine,acuma ramas singur cu mii si mii de idei nu am ce face cu ele.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i> Afara ninge abundent da nu imi pasa,inainte era scanteia ce aprindea in mine o dorinta arzatoare de viata,acuma ma lasa rece,reprezinta doar un obstacol ce ma retine din rutina mea zilnica.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>Ce frumos ar fi fost sa am amintiri cu noi,cum ne jucam in zapada,si oriunde asi fi fost ,oricand ar fi nins,m-asi fi gandit la tine la eu,la noi,si asi fi stat in loc si asi fi ras ca un prost,ca un nebun doar singur acolo,si nimeni nu ar fi stiut ca acel prost in acel moment traieste niste emotii si stari atat de puternice incat ii redau vitalitatea,dorinta de a continua.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i> Oricum sunt locuri ,obiecte pe langa care trec sau le ating imi amintesc de noi,de "our moments spent together" si nu stiu daca aceste clipe ma ranesc sau hranesc.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>Nu stiu daca vreodata te voi avea,nu stiu daca vreodata vom fi impreuna ,defapt nu stiu nimic.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i> Sunt sigur ,ca te iubesc tin la tine foarte mult,si asi face sacrificii pentru tine.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i> 5 ani </i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i><br /></i></span>
<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><i> Voi continua sa scriu sentimentele mele...cu rost sau fara,ele vor exista aici,vor servi ca amintire sau ca un seif.</i></span><br />
<br />
<br />
Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-81844348244406858852013-12-05T16:57:00.000+02:002013-12-06T17:19:10.713+02:00shifted emotionsshifted emotions<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
my dreams involve a passion from my heart<br />
lost in this world,driven so far,<br />
far from any reach and beyond.<br />
<br />
<br />
you are a word of silence<br />
is this loud spoken phrase<br />
a book without name. <br />
<br />
hidden on a shelf,<br />
far,far from any reach<br />
reminds a neverending depth<br />
layer upon layer of shifted emotions<br />
, backgrounded by changing states of mind,<br />
replenishes the body with constant fear<br />
constant doubt.<br />
<br />
keep second guessing the reliability of the estranged,<br />
misleading behavior,no emotion what-so-ever <br />
we as humans go a step down on an evolution level.<br />
<br />
the masks we used to hide behind<br />
taken us by surprise<br />
they are in control of us<br />
we are a shell of a shell of a spent bullet<br />
no more meaning just sickens the essence.<br />
<br />
diluated teardrop in an ocean of rain<br />
all these humans make me go insane<br />
it hurts to find out that I am lost<br />
when I need to be found<br />
shredded shattered ,sceam without any sound.<br />
<br />Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744132881155504226.post-8104930088410873562013-12-05T16:45:00.000+02:002013-12-05T16:45:35.713+02:00insomniacal delusionsinsomniacal delusions<br />
<br />
you were my muse,<br />
my beautiful,<br />
my happy end, my all<br />
your departure rotten my soul, my heart.<br />
<br />
miss you in a hurry<br />
mirrored in a time still<br />
my wandering body<br />
driven by my wondering heart,<br />
leads me to insomnia ,to many thoughts.<br />
<br />
<br />
although i can sleep i wake up to you,<br />
embedded in my mind,<br />
cant stop thinking at you<br />
my<span style="font-family: Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="line-height: 24px;"> </span></span> <span style="background-color: white; font-family: Helvetica, sans-serif; line-height: 24px;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">insomniacal </span></span>haunt<br />
from the shadows of my brain<br />
why cast this delusional tricks?<br />
can you feel that i am in hurt? in pain?<br />
or you don't care,<br />
love to drive me insane.<br />
<br />
<br />
I took you for granted,<br />
but babe I am human,<br />
composed of broken promises and heart<br />
not skilled in the survival art.<br />
<br />
but one thing is true<br />
I really do miss you<br />
even do months have passed<br />
and the alienating process took hold of the game,<br />
give us a couple of days,<br />
let them pass<br />
you will see ,<br />
that what is in out hearts<br />
makes us lasts.<br />
<br />
for a minute in the void<br />
and eternal in this world.<br />
<br />
<br />Demeter Szilardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09559571498163253727noreply@blogger.com0